A Different Kind of Booster

On a recent walk, I came upon a man standing on the side of the road. He had a pretty creepy vibe, but since I was on a trajectory to walk right past him, I figured I should probably say something. As I passed, I pushed my headphones off one ear, made eye contact, and said, “Hey, good to see you!”

Wait…what did I just say?

Yup. “Good to see you.” That’s what I chose to tell a creepy man I’d never seen before in my life. After two years of limited contact with other humans, my interpersonal muscles have atrophied. I can’t even manage a cliché conversation. At this point, folks, what I need more desperately than anything available from Pfizer or Moderna is a social skills booster.

I envision the SS booster re-instilling basic abilities like:

  • At a store: How to make idle chit-chat with the teller
  • At an event: How to engage in simple, unoffensive group conversation
  • In daily life: How to have a non-mortifying, two-second encounter with a stranger

Given how long the pandemic’s dragged on, I doubt I’m the only socially-impaired person flailing around the world. I recognize a booster shot may be unrealistic, but could someone please open some sort of post-pandemic finishing school?

4 thoughts on “A Different Kind of Booster

  1. Ha! That’s pretty funny. You will never know if your awkward comment caught him so off guard he forgot to act even mor creepy. Maybe it was actually the perfect thing to say!
    My dopey one (and I can’t blame the pandemic for this) is when airport staff say “have a good flight” and I say “you too.”

    Plus— you were out taking a walk and exercising. That’s a win!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. No kidding. For work I have a small mental pouch of acceptable phrases I can just draw from. At least a few times a day, out of hundreds of interactions typically, I’ll grab one that doesn’t quite fit and… it looks like this situation. lol… then cringe…

    Liked by 1 person

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